The first impression
»After all, what can a first impression tell us about someone we’ve just met for a minute in the lobby of a hotel? For that matter, what can a first impression tell us about anyone? Why, no more than a chord can tell us about Beethoven, or a brushstroke about Botticelli. By their very nature, human beings are so capricious, so complex, so delightfully contradictory, that they deserve not only our consideration, but our reconsideration—and our unwavering determination to withhold our opinion until we have engaged with them in every possible setting at every possible hour.«
Once said a wise man and the author of the book »A Gentleman in Moscow«. I totally agree with Amor Towles, but most of the time, and this is the bitter truth, everything stands and falls with the first impression, especially in the virtual world, where only a swipe decides whether you want to see someone on your screen or banish them forever. Of course, photos alone give no real meaning what a person can express with articulation, the cheerful laughter, the shine in the eyes, the simple presence. Nevertheless, today I want to address this topic and the immense value of the first impression and give a few important tips.
Our new podcast, in which Pascal and I chat about the world of paid dates, inspired me. In the next few weeks I will suggest some subjective improvements for the Ohlala community, starting with the perfect pictures, the better chat and our report function, which determines whether someone can continue to be part of this community or not.
It all starts with an upright statement. We want to know who we are dealing with and of course this also applies to our Ohlala users. Verified, i.e. »real« profiles are more interesting than non-verified ones. Our statistics prove that verified profiles are preferred. Of course, once an authenticity has been checked, the user also feels more secure. So, dear community, here’s how it works:
Take a picture of yourself with your personal handwriting on a note saying: »Hi Ohlala«, then upload this picture and another one so that we can compare the two photos and give you your individual approval. Only if both pictures are available and the identity can be proven, only then will you receive a so called »verified status« and thus secure you more trust towards the other users. Authenticity, that’s what it’s all about and that’s why we want to see more open profiles in the future. We know that not everyone wants to give up their cover, but remember that everything on the Ohlala side happens in a protected environment and everyone wants to benefit from real profiles.
Nobody wants to see faces overdrawn with funny dog stickers and so forth! Also with all other uploads we wish ourselves more open-mindedness, i.e. not that you must reveal yourself unrestrainedly, however you can stage the own pictures mysteriously with a little ingenuity, without having to reveal everything thereby. Because a photo that seems mysterious always makes you want more than a picture in which everything is already visible. The same goes for body pics, of course we like nudity, I definitely support this with my photographs, but a little effort doesn’t hurt. Aesthetic pictures are much more exciting than brightly drawn selfies in front of a mirror. It doesn’t take much to stimulate the imagination to get into the right mood, except a touch of seduction.
How to do that? Here are some inspirations:
Do’s and Don’ts:
We want more sensuality and curiosity in our community. With fake photographs, nature pictures, comic avatars, any trophy representations, like thick cars or splendid cocks, you won’t get far with us. We will not release these images, because they only lead to confusion. Generally I recommend you not to give too much insight in the chat and to avoid photographs in explicit poses, so I address myself specifically to all female users out there. Be vigilant and look closely at whether the person you are writing with should actually get this first impression of you or whether you would rather wait until you meet each other in real life. Let’s be honest, what could be nicer than to play with your own seductive power and just let the invisible user on the other side wriggle a bit.